An honest account of being a first time mum

Courage

Courage

Physically having a baby takes courage.

Being a mum takes courage.

Everyday you find the courage to try new things, to take charge. Sometimes just to get up and put your mascara on in the early days! Yes you get knocked back a lot by the the little confidence crushers that are our beautiful babies. But you find the courage over and over to get on with being a mum and the best one you can be at that.

Baby2011 has a lot of courage. The courage to put his hands down the toilet, the courage to climb anything in his way to reach something dangerous, and the courage to look me right in the eyes whilst he’s sat in his high chair having his lunch, smile his winning smile and lob the carefully, lovingly sliced and baked sweet potato wedges against the white front room wall.

I’ve found the courage this week to do a few new things. Ok, so basically I copied things and stole ideas from my mummy friends who are all so much more savvy, in control and cleverer than me and made me think I should buck my ideas up!

I’ve found the courage to give baby2011 fruit shoots as he won’t drink water on days that have a y in their name. He’s still functioning normally, despite all the worries of e numbers, sugar etc and at least he’s now drinking some form of liquid. Thank goodness for that *rolls eyes*.

I also found the courage to stop paying £6 every 4 weeks to get baby2011’s hair cut in a kidz (yes kidz) hair salon and have cut it myself. Contrary to dad2011’s opinion that he now looks like Ian Beale or Rodney Trotter it actually looks pretty good.

I found the courage to take baby2011 to a cranial osteopath. (A whole new blog!) and the courage to put my size 12 skinny jeans on and look in a mirror!

I needed a lot of courage to give baby2011 baked beans for tea the other evening. The wind did cause mass hysteria but the nappy wasn’t too bad in the morning. My baby recipe repertoire is expanding. Gourmet don’t you know!

This week me and dad2011 have needed lots of courage. Firstly because baby2011, who let’s face it has never been a fan of sleep, has been up all night and not even napped in the day. And secondly for the nappies and sick we dealt with on an hourly basis!

A sickness bug, a bout of teething and now all three of us having colds and hardly enough energy to find the sky plussed episodes of InThe Night Garden and Baby Jake has taken its toll on us all.

Romantic ideas of lunches in the spring sun and a few drinks once baby2011 went to bed were out the window quicker than an Essex girl can say “shud dup”!

The romantic family notions of skipping through meadowsswapped for Horlicks and bed before “no likey, no lighty” on a sat night and turning up at the in laws in time for a delicious roast on Sunday.

Still at the risk of sounding cheesy it was lovely to all be together. Even if me and dad2011 did lose it at 5am last weds morning mildly disagreeing on whether to administer calpol or not. I said no, he said yes, it was very political! This at the time of course ended in divorce discussions but by 7am we’d realised we liked each other too much and made up.

So courage mustered for birth, check!
Courage gained to be a good mum to my boy, check!
Courage to start back at work… Erm, oh hello Jack Daniels. It’s been a while old friend but you’re needed!

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