An honest account of being a first time mum

Archive for February, 2013

All change

Baby 2011’s vocabulary is really coming along and like the pushy parent I’ve always tried not to be I’m encouraging him to say anything and everything – “tractor”, “park”, “slide”, “swing”… “garlic” and “egg” are particularly hilarious. He also mastered, during a manic day in and out of the car – “dick head” and shouts “go go go” when we pull up at red lights like we’ve just raided a bank.

It’s all change again.

Nothing with baby2011 or our lives since having him has been revolutionary in terms of change (apart from that day we left the hospital with a tiny wrapped up newborn in a very expensive car seat wearing a hat with ears!) We’ve never had any epiphany moments that have meant baby2011 sleeping all night because we changed his tea time/bed time or because we made him run up and down the garden 100 times in the promise of a biscuit to just “please god wear him out!”

But things have slipped back into (dare I say) some kind of normality. Dad2011 has played a few rounds of golf and met friends for a few beers on the odd occasion and I have not screamed “you inconsiderate bastard, he’s screamed all day – do you know how many times I’ve cleared up the high chair today? – do you event comprehend what watching 5 episodes of something special does to a woman? – you have it so easy going off to work – I haven’t even had a f*cking shower!” Nope, not one obscenity has passed my lips. I have smiled, wished him a great time and meant it.

Things for me have changed a bit too these last few weeks I’ve started a kettlebell class and it’s in the evening (past my bedtime) but I haven’t turned into a pumpkin yet. And, I’ve been to bed later than 9pm. I’ve even been looking in shops for clothes and actually seen some things that I could perhaps pull off.

So swearing apart, I thought I’d blog a few changes I’ve noticed in baby2011. If for no other reason than to give a few parents out there who are in the up all night, rocking to sleep, food throwing, up at 4.30am stage (who don’t want to or who can’t do this controlled crying twaddle) a bit of hope that baby maturity and parental instinct do gradually mean change…

In the last few weeks (since we took the side off his cot and made it into a bed) baby2011 will lay in his bed with his nightlight on and with me pretending to be asleep next to him and after about 15 minutes of wriggling, sitting up, hitting me on the head, shouting “see saw marjory daw!?” he’ll lie down and go to sleep. This is the boy who I used to have to rock in my arms for up to an hour (despite a bed time routine that would put any army corporal to shame!) and then place gingerly in his cot for him to wake up 100 times before 10pm. He still wakes and he still rises early but now when he wakes up he’s happy to be chucked in our bed and he’ll go back to sleep until about 6am (after a year of 4.30/5am up and raring to go – this is heaven!).

So, I’m not in the kitchen at 5.05am every morning making “hot tea mummy” whilst he rams with his scuttlebug and my back is no longer twisted to oblivion sitting in that damn rocking chair listening to baby Einstein lullabies for 45 minutes after a day at work and a commute with Southern Trains that WILL turn me grey or see me on GBH charges.

He’ll also eat a cold lunch. Now this might seem ridiculous, but after a year of making hot lunches AND dinners for my little angel the fact that he will eat and is satisfied with a ham and cheese sandwich and some cucumber means a lot less washing up, a lot less prep and waiting time and it’s cheaper!

I also have given google a bit of a break. I don’t sit on the ipad all evening googling “when should I turn the cot into a cot bed?”, “when should you stop giving baby a bottle?”, what time should a 22 month old go to bed?”, “ How long and at what time should a 22month old nap?”. Nope – I no longer read the forums where parents all give their opinions, criticisms and shout about what worked for them (smug) and how their kids ONLY sleep 7pm-6.30am (grrrr). And it’s liberating.

When the going gets tough, as it inevitably does during the snot season, I have a very sympathetic French friend. Ms Sauvignon Blanc. We’ll why the hell not!? Cheers to change x